Too much Love will Kill you
by Water Lock
Summary: (Spoiler chapters 499 and 500 of the manga) The scars on his body weren't the only ones left after the war with Alvarez. Gray had an open wound inside him, a difficult one to heal, especially when Juvia continues to affirm that she is willing to risk her life for him, as many times as necessary. (Songfic) (Translated Fic)


**Fairy Tail and his characters do not belong to me. They are property of HIRO MASHIMA.**

 **"Too much Love will kill you" Queen's song (written by Brian May, Frank Musker, Elizabeth Lamers)**

 **AN: Spoiler of chapters 499 and 500 of the manga.**

 **Too much Love will Kill you**

 _Too much love will kill you_

 _Just as sure as none at all_

 _It'll drain the power that's in you_

 _Make you plead and scream and crawl_

 _And the pain will make you crazy_

 _You're the victim of your crime_

 _Too much love will kill you every time_

 _-Queen_

Gray woke up abruptly, covered in sweat, a suffocating heat spreading inside him. He was gasping for breath as if he were choking, inhaling and exhaling as if he'd been underwater. He ran his hand up his forehead and dug his fingers into his scalp. He was surprised to find that even his hair was wet, being an ice mage, it was strange for him to be so hot, not to mention sweating.

He lowered his foot off the bed down to the ground below him. The coolness that the floor brought him managed to somewhat relieve him. He concentrated on his breathing, trying to calm his large gasps of air into calm breaths. Once he did, he got up from the mattress.

He dragged his feet towards the kitchen, fatigue washing over his body. Images of his dream flashing in his mind as if trying to return him to the nightmare, pushing him to remember that tortuous situation that took his rest.

Once in the kitchen, he grabbed a bottle of cold water from the refrigerator, opening it, he took a long sip. The almost frozen liquid washed down his throat, turning off the fire that had lodged itself inside him along with the nightmare.

He could still see her in his mind. Her body covered with wounds, her clothes ripped to shreds, her beautiful, blue hair splashed with blood. He remembered the snow swirling around them, closing in on the battlefield that they never should have been on in the first place. Juvia raised her arm to the sky, a serene smile on her face, as if there really were no worries in the world.

Time stopped for him in that single moment, her blues eyes shining with content, happy with the decision she made. Her lips uttering incomprehensible words, smiling warmly. It was weird, she was smiling, such a contrast from the what was happening. It was the calm before the storm.

And without warning, one rapid movement of a hand punching straight through her abdomen. Blood and water mingled in the deadly attack that she had directed at herself, it was at that same moment that he too fell to his knees, victim to the same decision, taking his own life with the edge of his ice sword so that he might save the one he loved, or at least. That's what he intended to do...

Juvia not only was gravely wounded, but she had the nerve to save him by connecting her blood to his, giving him the _last_ drops of life that ran through her veins. She sacrificed herself for him as well as foiling his plan of suicide.

The worst part of his bad dream was the images were real, his mind brought him a memory that chased him with misery. The notion that it could be repeated tortured him if circumstances reoccurred; if something similar attacked them, he knew, without a doubt, that Juvia would make the same decision.

The miracle that she had survived was not a consolation. There was nothing he could do or say to prevent the water mage from doing something stupid. She, without hesitation, would give her life for him. Likewise, Gray would do the same for her, and between them, there would be a masochistic competition for who would take their life first for the other, which would be quicker to commit suicide, because neither one could bear to see the other die.

The conversation he had with her after the war flooded his thoughts. The stubbornness of the girl with blue hair was still so latent despite the deep wounds suffered by her body…

" _Promise me you will never do something as stupid as that again!" Gray asked desperately once the war ended as Wendy finished disinfecting the scar on the water mage's delicate body._

 _"Juvia cannot promise that, Gray-sama," Juvia replied, calmly, a soft smile on her graceful face, "Juvia cannot help but protect you," She said, her eyes filled with sincerity._

 _"I don't want you to do that," He all but begged, "I don't want you to take care of me,"_

 _"Juvia must do it," She replied firmly, looking down at the bandages that were placed over her wound, "She prefers to die before seeing Gray-sama mortally wounded,"_

 _"And what do you think I prefer?" He asks softly, "Doesn't it matter how I feel?" He asked as her expressive, dark eyes rose to his, confusion furrowing its deep blue._

Was his sacrifice not enough to prove his feelings? Does she really believe that he would take his own life for just anyone? He said right at that moment, his life being slipped through the edge of the sword. He did it for _her_.

Maybe he was not as honest or forthcoming as her, it's not like he could shout it to the air, or prove it all the time, but _damn!_ Couldn't she see it?! Could she not feel it?! If she knows about love, as much as she claims to, why can't she see that he loved her?

 _"Do you need me to say it?" Gray asked softly, "After everything we went through..."_

 _"Juvia doesn't need anything because she's happy just loving you, Gray-sama," Juvia said, her eyes filled with love, "Juvia's feelings are so strong and warm that she is happy just with that. You don't have to feel obligated to say what you don't want to express" The words entered his ears, but Gray could not understand them, they bounced in his ears like little balls and lose significance._

 _"You don't understand..." Gray said, his voice barely coming out as a whisper._

 _"Juvia understands," She says, standing up with difficulty, she checks her bandaged wound, then thanks Wendy for her treatment who left to see another injured partner. The fingers of the water mage caress the bandages that cover the wound she inflicted on herself to save Gray, "Juvia_ _understands that Gray-sama has feelings towards her, but..." Her eyes staring at him, "Does Gray-sama understand Juvia? Does Gray-sama know how true her words are when she says she loves him?"_

 _"Yes," Gray responds, "I understand,"_

 _"You don't," Juvia said, gently holding his cheek in her soft hand, "Gray-sama doesn't understand how anyone can love him like Juvia does," She pauses, "You don't feel worthy of it,"_

It was true. He did not understand why someone like her, so pure, so warm, could be so deeply in love with someone like him, who carried the weight of a curse on his shoulders; loving him was risky. Everyone who loved him deeply...died. Gray could not even bear the thought of losing her because of his cruel fate.

The door of the room opened delicately, revealing the water mage herself dressed only in one of Gray's t-shirts that ended just above her knees, her light blue hair messy, her eyes still dilated with sleep.

"Another nightmare, Gray-sama?" She asked, a long yawn following her words.

"Yeah..." He answered, turning his gaze to the bottle of cold water.

"Bad memories?" She said gently, sitting next to him, her blue gaze staring intently with concern. Gray thought about what he was going to say, delaying his response. He didn't want to disturb her more than she already was, but he couldn't lie to her either. Juvia knew him better than anyone.

Gently, Juvia took his hand in hers, interlacing their fingers, a tender smile on her face, "Juvia knows what your dreams are about, Gray-sama, because she has the same nightmares,"

He watched as their fingers intertwined, her small hand wrapping around his, clinging to him gently.

"But," Juvia says, "When she wakes up and has you by her side, Juvia doesn't feel so afraid," She said, forcing him to look into her eyes by bringing her other hand to his chin, directing his head to her. She slid her fingers over his face gently, caressing his cheek. Gray closed his eyes, enjoying the soft caresses of the water mage, "Because we are together and that's all that matters," Juvia said firmly, laying her forehead against his.

"We shouldn't," Gray replied, his voice choked with emotion, "It's dangerous, I..." He started, but his voice trailed off, even just the thought of it was too much,

"You are not dangerous, Gray-sama," Juvia whispered, her eyes pleading for him to understand, "You can't blame yourself for others actions, even if they are risky,"

"But you..." Gray said helplessly, once again not being able to find the words to describe what he felt.

"Juvia will do what she believes is right just as she did at that moment," She said, her response causing Gray to grit his teeth and close his eyes.

She once again caresses his cheek, her silent plea for him to not look away, "Juvia doesn't regret giving her life to save you. She would do it as many times as needed,"

"I don't want you to do that," Gray said, his voice coming out in a whisper.

"And Juvia doesn't want you to sacrifice yourself for her," She responds, "Could you do it? Could you promise Juvia that you will not risk your life ever again to protect her?" She asks, her deep blue eyes burning with intensity.

"I can't..." Gray pauses, "I can't promise you that. If you are in danger then I..."

"You would make the same decision just like Juvia," She responds, finishing his sentence.

Gray wished that she wouldn't get so close to him. He wanted to protect her from the curse of loving him...but it was impossible. She was too persistent, and the love she gave him slipped through the cracks of his frozen heart. Juvia broke down his ice walls and made her way into him, into his life, and now he could not get away from her. He had already tried so many times, and each...she'd pull him right back.

He took the hand that caressed his cheek, and placed a soft kiss on her palm, closing his eyes, covering the pain that was brewing in them.

"Let's go to sleep," He finally said, getting up from the chair once again holding the bottle of ice water.

Juvia stood up as well, waiting for him to go to the room with her.

They made their way into the room, and as they leaned back on the bed Juvia snuggled into Gray's chest as he wrapped his arms tightly around her, embracing her with everything he had. He remained lying down, Juvia pressed against his body, staring blankly at the ceiling of his bedroom.

The conversation didn't reassure him whatsoever, if anything it only confirmed his thoughts. Juvia was as stubborn as she was in his nightmare and that would pursue his dreams forever.

After all, she loved him too much to live without him, and he loved her too much to live without her...so much so that they would die for each other.

 **THANKS FOR READING**

This story is a translation of a fic that I wrote in spanish for the "12 Meses de Fanfics" challenge on the Motin Fanficker page.

I hope you liked it! Any comment will be welcome!

I want to thank **Ressa4043** , who helped me with the corrections of the translation and also suggested some changes that improved the story. Thank you!


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